Tuesday, November 21, 2000

The Handy Man

A+E snapshot bl4

A man walks into the department with his friend. And yes, he WALKED in. His friend is pale, and clutching a heavy plastic carrier bag. But the Man is definition of pale itself. whiter than white.
Except for a big bright red towel he is holding at his shoulder, no wait, that's not a red towel is it?
It's actually a pale green towel that's wearing half the man's circulating blood volume.
"...help... I think I've cut off my arm"
ohmegod.
He lies shocked, on the trolley whilst staff scurry about resuscitating him.
He trapped his arm in a machine that usually cuts the heads off chickens before they go to sainsbury's/asda/randomsupermarket.
"Where's the arm?"
His friend holds up the carrier bag and you can see he's desperately trying not to vomit.
"get it in ice quick"
Another doctor outside hears that a "major trauma" is in the resus room, and , being the helpful sort of person he is, pops his head round the door to ask "do you need a hand?"